Forewarning: This is a looong read!

Five days ago, life pushed me up another rung on the age ladder. I welcomed 29 with a grateful heart, in a new city, and as yet another reminder that there is another chapter to my story—there is still work to be done, and my capacity has not been exhausted. God is not yet done with me. And it excites me to step into the newness that lies ahead!

Usually, I mark this time with a message on this space about life, getting older, and what it all means. But as I sat down this year to write those words, everything somehow felt different. I somehow knew that I couldn’t just put down the same type of message I’d sent years before because it would just be re-telling you everything you’d already heard. Instead, I felt a nudging deep in my soul, and it inspired me to share something else—something that not only was very special but may well have been the best thing yet.

For the past year and five months, I’ve actively lived out not only my personal dream but the dream of many others as well. In fact, it’s so much of a dream that there are times when I still have to pinch myself to believe that it’s all real.

While hopping on flights one after the other, traveling around the world full-time in a lifestyle known as “digital nomad,” I’ve gained many unforgettable experiences and learned many lessons. I know it may seem like it’s all rainbows and butterflies across from where I stand, but believe me, IT’S NOT.

And, conveniently, my birthday month always puts me in a reflective mood (bigtime). It gets me thinking about the things that have happened and the things I wish to happen. When I reflected on all of that, I, as usual, took out my journal to write down my thoughts (and share bits and pieces of those here). After all, what better way to celebrate another year around the sun than by doing what I love to do—THIS.

But I’m not planning to share a travel writeup or a synopsis of all the different travel stories I’ve written, but rather a way to put into words little pieces of my heart and somehow describe how the past year of being on this journey transformed me as a person and imprinted certain realizations deep within my being.

These realizations, although personal, are universal as well. That’s why I need to share them with you because they’re not mine to keep. After all, isn’t that the core of why certain things happen to us? Not only so that we can grow and learn from them, but also so that we can use them to connect on a deeper level with others and hopefully establish something positive with that connection.

first things first…

One thing I need to clarify before continuing with this story is the understanding of what I’ve come to realize about digital nomads. When I started this journey, I had many preconceived notions about the image one should have, and I suspect many others do as well.

Every day, we see a plethora of blogs and on social media that project the lifestyle in specific ways. But as I’ve met other nomads throughout my travels, I’ve realized that everyone has a different story. Every single nomad has their own unique purpose or reason for embarking on this lifestyle, and no two stories are the same. Some of them are freelancers, others are online business owners, and some, like myself, continue to work regular hours (yes, I work a full 9 hours a day). The one thing that we all have in common is that we all are location-independent. But even that aspect looks different for all of us.

The first month of my own journey saw me living out many of these preconceived notions about what the lifestyle entailed. I’d spend the day getting my work done in different cute and interesting cafes (as long as they had WiFi, of course!) and watching the locals stroll by as I pounded away on my keyboard. In between working, I’d spend time exploring, wandering around, and sampling the best food that I could find in the city without any real idea of where I’d end up next.

After a short while, though, I realized that my routine wasn’t working well for me—it just had too many distractions. I needed to be alone somewhere to work so I could stay focused and productive. So I changed my strategy to staying in my flat during the day and getting my work done, only leaving when I needed something or took a lunch break. When my working hours were up, that’s when I’d get out and start exploring more. And you know what? It ended up working better for me. However, to be honest, I’m still in awe of those other nomads who share “office-of-the-day” photos and work from all sorts of cool locations.

Also, I’ve met nomads that don’t stay in one place longer than a few weeks and others that only change location once a year. I’m a bit of a combination of those. As a resident of Dubai, I need to return at least every six months to keep my residency, so I plan my travels around that requirement, which helps form my schedule. In fact, my move to Albania was my first after having to live back in Dubai for a month to renew my residency for another two years, and I’m so excited to get going on this new adventure!

And while it’s safe to say that I’ve been extremely fortunate to work for a fantastic company that also happens to have allowed me to work remotely, I could never deny my desire to break away just because…

i have this constant need to break away

When I started this journey, many friends and family thought I simply chose the lifestyle because I love traveling so much. It’s true, though. Anyone who’s met me has likely heard me say, “There’s a big world out there!” And there is—and I’m addicted to exploring it.

It’s just that I love being out there, wandering around new places, collecting memories, immersing myself in new cultures, and meeting people everywhere I go. But in reality, I based my decision on so much more. It’s hard to explain, but you know how sometimes you’re living your life, and nothing’s wrong. In fact, you’re actually very happy, but something deep inside of you just tells you that there’s something more out there. It’s like you’ll lie awake at night and wonder about what you could or should do and the chances you should take. And then you just feel an overwhelming urge to do those things and take those chances because life is fleeting, and opportunities don’t last forever. It’s hard to describe, but that’s kind of how I felt. 

I need to break away. And it’s more than just moving far, far away from home. Rather, it was more of a voice inside of me, leading me to break away from the world’s standards of who I should become. Do you know how there’s an unspoken set of expectations when you reach a certain stage in your life? I felt those expectations looming over my head—getting closer and closer.

That’s why I felt ready to spread my wings as far as they could reach and prove to myself that I could push the limits and fly out of my comfort zone. In fact, I wanted to fly so far out of it that I would never return. It was definitely the right time in life to be whatever and whoever I wanted to be. And becoming a digital nomad was one step toward developing into the person I knew I was meant to be.

So, with determination, I set out and chased after it, believing that I could do it—to live my dream and do it on my terms. So what did I do? I broke the mold. I forged my own path, which took courage and wasn’t without risk, but I did it anyway. After that initial step, nothing would hold me back. If an obstacle got in my way or someone told me something couldn’t be done, I’d brush it off and continue forging my path even further. Once I realized that my life was my path to create, I became unstoppable.

If you read this old story of mine, you might recall when I did the same thing, going all in for South Africa, only this time it worked.

If there’s one thing I’ve always known about myself, it’s that determination is one of my strong suits. I’m all in or none at all. So, even though I failed my first attempt four years ago, I never truly laid down my sword and gave it up. Patience is hard, but I knew that good things take time. And, in God’s perfect timing, I was finally directed down the path I had always desired.

but there’s more to it than just breaking away

Along the way of this journey, I realized something of great magnitude as it is far from the normality of our culture, at least in the Philippines, where I was born and raised. When I started traveling very often, I almost never met someone from my own country. In fact, I’ve never personally met a single digital nomad from the Philippines. While we can all look up the origins of the term “digital nomad,” nothing resembling this concept originated in a third-world country for sure. So, it’s safe to say that my decision to pursue this way of life is part of my effort to break down barriers.

I knew deep down that I couldn’t be the only one—that other Filipinos had to have the same “bug” that I had—the same innate desire to break away. However, many of them didn’t act upon it because of social pressure and cultural expectations. So, I became more determined than ever to not allow myself to be molded in the same box because it wasn’t who I really was as a person, and I refused to be held back by expectations. 

Also, if I could throw out the world’s stereotypes of what a Filipino person had to be, maybe others could also find the courage to do it, and that helped to instill in me even more of a sense of purpose for what I’d chosen to do.  

even so, i’ve merely scratched the surface of this

I’ve gained so much knowledge over the past year, but I still have a volume more to learn. In terms of experience, I’d still consider myself a “baby” in this lifestyle. I’ve met digital nomads who’ve been living this way for five years or more, and their stories and lessons inspired, humbled, and kept me going at times. Even though I’m not yet an “expert,” I’ve cataloged a lot of realizations and lessons learned, and, as I’ve already mentioned in the beginning, they aren’t mine to keep.

And if this is one of the ways I can continue to make my journey meaningful, I am all for it—for sharing every aspect and every thing that has helped me grow and shape who I am now. And, maybe, just maybe, they might inspire others currently considering this lifestyle.

on to the lessons and realizations…

1. losing a “home”

The concept of “home” has been ingrained in most of us since we were young. The home was where you could be safe, be rested, be yourself, and where the outside world couldn’t touch you. For many, home is something that’s taken for granted—that place you can always return to, no matter where life takes you. Somewhere along the way on this journey of mine, I realized that, in a sense, I’m essentially homeless.

Not that long ago, I had to visit the Apple store in Cologne, Germany, to get something fixed. As I made small talk with the person helping me out, our conversation touched on topics like where I’d been and what brought me there, and then suddenly, it got to the topic of home. The salesperson asked me where “home” was for me, and I could only answer with silence.

It was then that I realized just how difficult of a question this was for me. You see, the truth is that I just don’t know. Yes, I live in Dubai, but it’s not my home. Not only does it not feel like “home” to me, but I also don’t have my own residence there. I use my friend’s Dubai address on everything, so although my name is attached to it, it’s not really mine.

But what about the Philippines? Is that “home” to me? It’s where I grew up, but I can’t say that it’s still home because it’s not. I rarely ever return there now, so it’s not my home anymore.

Somewhere along my journey, I faced the hard realization that I didn’t actually have a home. I don’t have a place where I can return after traveling for a long time, kick my feet up, and rest for a while. There’s not a regular location that I return to for Christmas or New Year’s. I can’t host family and friends anywhere for a celebration or a dinner party, nor can I spend the afternoon at IKEA and load up my cart with furniture and decor because there wouldn’t be any place to put it. Simply put, I don’t have a place to call home.

Now, by the world’s standards, my “homelessness” is strange. A person who’s almost in her 30s should have some sense of stability. After all, my friends, family, and people I went to college with are all settling down. They’re having families of their own, buying homes and building their lives within those four walls, and I see it happening every day, but I don’t let it bother me like you’d think it might. I never once chose to feel bad about it or regret the path I’ve taken.

Now, of course, I’m only human, so yes, there are times when this reality hits me and causes me to pause and reflect for a minute.

I recently had dinner with a friend in Dubai, and my living situation came up. I was honest and told her about the time I broke down from exhaustion and feelings of loneliness while traveling. But I think that comes a lot with the digital nomad lifestyle.

In fact, almost every digital nomad I’ve talked to or met (both online and offline) has had the same experience and feelings at certain times. I’ve come to realize that it’s only human nature. We all yearn for company. We all still carry that need for a home somewhere deep inside. However, at the end of the day, it all comes down to what makes us happy and what makes life meaningful. I’m a big believer in living with a purpose, and for now, I know that I’ve found mine, whether I have a true “home” or not.

Never have I regretted choosing my own path or having a different pursuit of happiness than my other friends and family members, and I can tell you that it’s often difficult for me to just bring things up because, sadly, it’s almost impossible to relate to me.

2. it’s almost impossible to relate to me

I’ve always felt a little bit like the “black sheep” of the world, and I’ve always kind of known that I have different pursuits and a different definition of fulfillment, happiness, and success than most others.

However, my understanding of these things has never been clearer than it is now.

Maybe it comes from being on the road and coming across people from all different walks of life. As I meet people, I realize more than ever that my pursuit of happiness looks very different than theirs.

I can’t pinpoint exactly why I feel like I can’t relate that much to others, but I guess it has to do mostly with the way the world is today. We’re stuck on a rollercoaster of capitalism, and almost everyone is trapped in the endless ups and downs, curves and twists that come along with that. Do you know what I mean? It’s the endless cycle of hustling, earning money, spending money, building things, and collecting things. It’s almost like once you step on that ride, you can never step off.

So far, I’ve refused to get on it, making me the “odd one out.” I’m the person that everyone seems to say they admire but that they don’t want to be like. So, I’m always just stuck a little bit off in the distance and always seem to feel a little bit unrelatable.

And speaking of all of that “stuff,”…

3. the “stuff” weighs you down. Less really is more

This lesson was hard for me at first. Not because I’m materialistic, but because it’s hard to fit your life into a single bag (seriously). Anyone who’s even vacationed for a week or two likely faced a similar feeling.

Many nomads succeed in this goal, and they do it very well. I’ve met numerous nomads who live with nothing more than a duffle bag or backpack, and it always amazes me. But for me, it proved challenging. Maybe it’s because I didn’t really see it coming, so I had limited time to prepare for a journey like this one. But I suppose I can’t really use that as an excuse.

I’ve always had a lot of clothes. If you looked in my (used-to-have) closet, you‘d see things I bought years ago that still had the tags on them! But to become a digital nomad, I would have to sort through my vast wardrobe and narrow it down to just the essentials that would get me comfortably through my adventures.

Each time I prepared to set out again, it would take me hours to decide what to bring and what to leave behind. “What if I need that dress for a stroll through the city?” my mind would think as I shuffled through the hangers in my closet. Or, “Perhaps those shoes aren’t great for running to catch a train, but they’d sure look amazing if I’m sitting at a little seaside cafe.”

As I bargained with my mind, I found it hard to balance my more realistic self and the person who just couldn’t leave that cute black dress behind. In the end, I wound up starting out with two suitcases and a backpack, which I lugged around with me for the first few months of my journey. Although this might not seem like a lot for some travelers, it is definitely unusual for the nomadic lifestyle. 

I soon realized that it was likely not sustainable to keep trekking around with this amount of baggage weighing me down, and I vowed to do better. When I took my trip to Portugal back in June, I did major work in this area and ended up only with a carry-on and a backpack. It worked beautifully. Since then, I’ve only carried two bags on all of my trips. Oh, the feeling of accomplishment!

But it’s deeper than just realizing how to minimize my packing and working on how to physically lug less stuff from place to place. It’s more of a realization that having more things doesn’t always make you happy.

I’m not saying that I’ve mastered this area. I’m definitely not at the level of “minimalist” yet, but I do stop and think more before I purchase things now, and it helps me to better live with purpose. So I can be honest when I say that I haven’t really shopped in a long time. Well, except for some new running gear, but that’s a necessity for my current path and goals. Overall, though, my shopping is definitely not at the same level as it was before.

So, yes, the “stuff” really does weigh you down… and not just physically. Not surprisingly, clearing all of the material clutter from my life left me with way more room for mental clarity and happiness. Cleaning out the stuff cleans out your soul as well.

And I suppose that recognition itself is a part of growing and learning, and maybe at some point, I will just keep one suitcase and stay in a single place for several months before moving on to the next one.

That’s the beauty of this journey. I make up my own rules as I trek along.

This trek, however, is not only physically demanding. The mental game is just as prevalent.

4. it’s physically demanding and mentally exhausting

Throughout all the fun, amazing days, and incredible adventures, the ugliness of life doesn’t just stop or disappear. You’ll get sick. You’ll get tired. You’ll break down and cry. It’s different than being on vacation. People generally plan vacations around relaxation and self-care. With the digital nomad lifestyle, you must make an active effort to ensure that you master how to take care of yourself and make time for relaxation and self-care.

You need to be willing and able to deal with instability and stress. If you can’t handle those things, you’ll likely break down all the time. Think about it. You’re moving to a new city every few months (or more often). When you get there, you have to find a place to live that you like and feel comfortable in—that’s challenging enough in real life! Next, you’ll want to seek out the spots in the city that would be your “sweet spots,” you know, the places that you connect with and make you feel happy. It takes a bit of time to orient yourself to those places as well, but finding them is very important. 

Of course, you also have to feed yourself. So, now you’ll have to look for markets that have food you like and other necessities. And not every place you go will be within walking distance, so you’ll have to master finding the right transportation as well, all while using unfamiliar currency and maybe not speaking the language very well.

All of these things could stress someone out if they had to do them once or twice in their lives. But, as a digital nomad, just when you get settled, it’s time to move on again. It’s a complete restart of your life four to six times a year, and it often feels like you have no level of stability because, well, you don’t.

I remember getting very ill last year while traveling in Romania. I’d been running myself thin by getting up early each day to fit in my full-time work schedule and then spending every minute after work going out, meeting people, and exploring. After several consecutive days of this seemingly non-stop routine, my body couldn’t handle it anymore. I was run down and depleted. Even if I wanted to keep going, my body wouldn’t let me. I had to surrender, accept that I was sick, and rest. 

I learned an important lesson there. The digital nomad lifestyle is real life. Not being at home doesn’t mean you’re exempt from these hardships. It’s how you deal with them that makes you stronger. When you don’t have someone dear to you to deliver cupcakes or ramen to your door, you’ve got to find another way to hold yourself up and move on. There’s no time for pity parties when you’re in a foreign country, stuck in bed with a 102° fever. You do what you need to recover, and then you continue on.

However, when you do recover, it’s incredibly liberating. Nothing makes you feel stronger and more self-reliant than picking yourself up and moving forward without the help of family or friends. It doesn’t matter if it’s when you are sick or simply just feeling “down.” It’s truly an amazing feeling.

I’ve never felt more indestructible than when I’ve had to deal with these challenges alone in a foreign country without a single soul to call. They taught me so much more about who I am, and although they were hard, I wouldn’t change them for the world.  

5. many people, few connections

I’m definitely a people person (well, more like an introverted extrovert), and before I set out last year, I had visions of connecting with new people everywhere I went. I imagined I’d make lifelong connections and share experiences with other travelers. One of the biggest lessons I learned was that making these connections would be more challenging than I thought.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s easy to meet people wherever you go, especially if you’re social. But most of those connections are fleeting—superficial conversations that last a few moments and then fade into the wind. They’re fun but not always fulfilling.

Soon into my journey, I realized that I had to put extra effort into making connections. I couldn’t just show up somewhere and expect my new best friend to fall out of the sky. So I started putting myself out there more and not shying away from what might be a chance, and it worked (somehow).

Since I started solo traveling, I would always seek out and join Facebook groups geared towards other travelers like me (i.e., Backpackers in XXXX, Solo Travelers in XXXX, Girls in XXXX and the likes) before going to a new place, which is basically the same strategy I use now. Through these groups, I could connect with others who would be in the same location as me at the same time. We could share experiences, meet up for a walk, or plan excursions together. It definitely took some of the stress off of trying to meet new people everywhere I went. But now that I’m not just a “traveler,” I do more than I used to. I would always try to engage in a genuine conversation rather than making small talk. And this has already resulted in a few successes for me! A few (yes, just a few!) of the people I met through these groups have become great friends with whom I am still in contact!

Although this strategy works to meet people in different places, most, if not all, of these conversations don’t create deeper connections (about 99% I’d say). And I’ve come to realize and accept that those deeper connections we all crave are nearly impossible when you’re only in a certain area for a short time.

Since I was only usually staying in one location for a couple of months, the friendships I made couldn’t really scratch beyond the surface. Yes, they were fun, exciting, and fulfilling at the moment, but they likely wouldn’t ever be more than that. Truth be told, I’d say that I only really truly connected with less than 5% of the people I’ve met since starting my nomadic life.

I’m not saying that I don’t appreciate these basic connections or that it doesn’t ever hurt my feelings when I don’t always get to catch up with people when I go somewhere and try to meet them. No, I’m not completely numb, and I can’t say that it never bothers me. In fact, a lot of the time, it’s actually quite frustrating.

However, I’ve come to accept these frustrations as a part of life and not let them make me bitter or unwilling to keep making new connections. I still take the opportunities to make new friends and attempt to form lasting connections. I just realize now that most of them won’t turn into anything lifelong, and it’s OK.

In fact, sometimes these connections and friendships even leave me a bit “empty” (for lack of a better word). It’s not super easy to explain, but I’ll do my best. You see, it’s kind of like when you meet someone at a conference or a party and connect with them so well that you think, “This is really the start of a great friendship!” Then, as you talk to them more, you realize that they live far away, and you’ll likely not be able to connect with them again regularly after that night. That’s kind of how I felt everywhere I went.

Humans crave connections with others who know them intimately, including their faults and quirks. They want people who are committed to being there for them, even with all of those things. So, of course, these are things that I naturally want as well. 

But the reality is that these types of connections are ones you can only achieve with time. Starting a platonic friendship is not much different from starting a romantic one. In the beginning, it’s playful, fun, and enthusiastic, but it will never develop into anything more than that unless you can devote proper time to it, and sometimes that takes months or years.

Although many wonderful people entered my life during my travels and made my adventures more enjoyable and inspiring, I found myself starting to suffer from a bit of an “emotional drought,” and I yearned for people who could feed my soul a bit more—the ones who really, truly knew and understood me. I often think that it might be nice to have someone like that to share my days and experiences with, but as I’ve just mentioned, I’ve learned to accept that it would be a rare find.

And, in the process of locating that “rare” find, I am losing more friends.

6. losing “more” friends

I recently had a phone call with one of my best friends—one I’m glad to say is a keeper because, despite the fact that our friendship has been long distance for nearly a decade and we don’t do regular check-ins, nothing has changed.

As with the reality of life, it’s impossible for us to still have ALL of the same friends we had years ago—even those people with whom we shared perhaps some of our most unforgettable experiences. However, becoming a digital nomad may have made this a thousand times more difficult. And I did make this confession, albeit with a hint of sadness, telling her that I’ve realized that I can now count all of my friends on one hand that on the day I get married, I could just do a small, closed dinner because there’s no need for a big place to accommodate people.

Before I set out on this journey, I was already aware of the fact (I say fact because it is backed by science and should not come as a surprise to you) that the older we get, the fewer friends we have. As we get older, our priorities shift, and that isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

As it was in my case, after only a year of nomadism, it felt like this aspect of my life had gone downhill at breakneck speed. Perhaps it is because I am so intent on making connections in every corner of the world that any energy saved to catch up with friends has already been expended. Not to mention the time difference, which can already be a major source of difficulty.

Although this became a little frustrating, I’ve come to regard it as a gift.

At this point in my journey, and in life in general, I am more determined than ever to cut people off when I feel it is necessary. Don’t get me wrong, losing people sucks. But, in reality, certain people in our lives inadvertently impede our growth and progress, and it’s okay to let them go. I’d rather focus my efforts on the people who matter. And it has made me appreciate even more the people who have truly accepted who I am and supported the path that I have relentlessly pursued. It rather makes me feel secure to know that these one or two people know me inside and out and are the people I know will always have my back, just as I will always have theirs.

In the end, you’d realize that you never truly lose what is meant for you, and you’re merely wasting vital time attempting to maintain unproductive friendships.

7. living in the moment and learning more about yourself

Like anyone, I have my moments when I’m stuck in anxiety or fear about the unknown future, and often in the past, it’s caused me to sabotage the present. But I’ve noticed that this journey has changed me a bit. I no longer find myself constantly worrying about the future or dwelling on the past. Instead, I’m living in the NOW, and it’s so freeing.

It wasn’t a change that happened overnight, but over the course of my year as a digital nomad, I’ve noticed myself naturally shifting in this direction. I can’t quite place exactly what caused it, but I think that knowing I won’t be a digital nomad forever makes me truly want to savor each and every moment along the way.

I don’t even know how long this season of my life will last, but I take great comfort in knowing that everything that happens now is for now, and I’ll leave the future to the future.

I think many of us feel this way, especially those in our late 20s or early 30s. We’re kind of stuck in this cycle of over-analyzing the effect that each decision we make will have on our future, so we’re unable to really sit back and enjoy the present. We might not take a chance that we want to because it strays from the path we think we should take. 

I guess the message is that I wish we could all realize that it’s a terrible shame not to fully enjoy the present because we’re so focused on trying to plan for the future. Remember, we’re only young once!

As for the latter…

Each day, from the moment we wake up until the moment we fall asleep, we’re faced with decisions. Some are big, and some are small, but how we react to them says something about what we ultimately want and who we are as individuals.

When I talk about learning more about myself, it means that this journey has truly brought me back to my core. I’m constantly reminded of exactly why I chose this path for my life and what I want to get out of it. There’s no way that I would be able to stay sane and not suffer from an existential crisis if I didn’t have a clear sense of both of those things. You can’t just jump on a “ship” like this without knowing what direction it’s heading in.

I’m the type of person who constantly pushes herself out of her comfort zone, but being on this journey has given me a better understanding of what I’m truly capable of, and it’s more than I could have ever imagined. All of these things—knowing who you are, what you want in life, being clear with your intentions, and staying out of your comfort zone—are critical to discovering your true life’s purpose.

8. your experiences are your life’s riches   

This is definitely one of the things that keeps me going.

I want to say that my life is kind of an oxymoron—I have nothing, but I have everything. On the one hand, I have nothing that so many others have and appreciate, but on the other hand, I have what I consider to be so very much more.

Every day I’m truly filled with joy at the progress I’m making in discovering and genuinely knowing my authentic self, and I couldn’t be happier! After all, how many others can say that they spend their days living in the moment and doing the things they love and enjoy?

There’s a saying that’s something like “the world is our playground,” and I’ve adopted it as a sort of personal motto. Every morning when I wake up, I approach the day and the world around me with a childlike wonder. This attitude keeps me curious, encourages me to have fun, and makes me feel more connected to the earth. It also makes me feel rich, full, and complete, and is one of life’s greatest gifts.

Someday, when I have my own children, I hope to teach them this same magic and instill this sense of excitement and wonderment about the world into their hearts. And I know I’ll be able to do it because I’ve lived it and understand just how great it feels.

And when I grow older and have grandchildren, I’ll also be able to share this experience with them, painting it in their minds through the stories and memories I’ve collected. And what will those memories and stories be? I can tell you that they won’t be the tales of the hardships that happened or the times I missed my material belongings. They won’t be the memories of how I had to trudge two miles through a torrential rain storm to catch the last train out of the city. No. The memories that I will paint into their minds will be those ones that involve living—truly living.

Again, this is another idea that’s not the easiest to explain, but I’ll do my best because I know for sure that it’s something every living person can relate to. After all, you wouldn’t be who you are today without those kinds of memories throughout your life that molded your character.

If I have to give just one example for now, I’ll reflect back on an experience that I had in Tallinn on an extremely cold winter night. You know, the kind of night where the cold gets in your bones and you can see your breath drifting off like puffy clouds in the distance.

Well, on that night, I had my first cold water swimming experience underneath the still black winter sky dotted with the twinkle lights of faraway stars. And I know that to others it may seem insignificant or like no big deal, but to me it’s much more.

I remember EVERYTHING about those moments—who I was with, what my body felt like, what the sky and the stars looked like, and even the sounds that cut through the frozen air. It’s just a part of me now.

And even if I ever do experience it again (for the third time, which I’m sure I will!), the memories of that first time will still be engrained in me and the ones that I will reflect back on and use to tell my story or explain certain parts of me. Why? Because memories like that one not only change you, but also stay with you for the rest of your life.

Point is, it doesn’t have to be cold water swimming. These memories or experiences cannot be taken away by anyone or anything, and that is what truly enriches one’s life, at least for me.

You see, your stories are invaluable. Life is for living, and when you begin to truly live your life, you will no longer feel the need to stress over attaining the material definition of wealth.

9. becoming your own best friend

I consider myself to be comfortable being alone. I don’t mind eating dinner in a restaurant or spending the weekend by myself. But I’m also a social butterfly. I love the connections I’ve made throughout the years.

I wasn’t necessarily surprised that when I became a digital nomad, I’d get lonely sometimes, but I was a bit surprised at how often I’d feel lonely. When you’re in an unfamiliar country and it seems like everyone around you is just going about their day-to-day lives, and people back home are doing the same as well, loneliness can suddenly hit you.

I’ve missed birthday parties, weddings of my best friends and many more important celebrations while I’ve traveled. And even though I’ve also met some incredible people at my destinations, at the end of the day, it’s just me, alone tucked away in my rented flat.

But I would like to point out here that it definitely served as a reminder about the importance of becoming your own best friend and being OK with that fact. Seeing that although sometimes I may feel lonely, I’m never really alone (I DO have friends and family who will always be there for me) has put a new perspective on things.

Whenever I’m on the road and the temptation to feel sad about being lonely hits, I take a step back and re-evaluate. I’ll reach out to a good friend and chat for a little bit or even just exchange a few messages, and my mood will lift. Most importantly, I’ll always remind myself just how privileged I am to have this lifestyle, the experiences, and the hardships that come with it. Those things help me to focus once again on feeling grateful and allow me to start the next day feeling renewed. It’s almost like patting myself on the back!

And each day when I wake up, I do exactly what I want to do and go where I want to go without having anyone there to tell me I can’t or persuade me to do things differently. I can’t even begin to feel sad about that, not at all.

Finally, as I mentioned, I have friends and family that I can reach out to and lean on for support when I need it, and I’m fully aware that’s a privilege in and of itself. There’s so much true loneliness in the world—people stuck in institutions, the elderly who don’t have anyone to visit them, and people without any living family at all—that feeling lonely because of my own choices is just a small drop of what those other people suffer each day.

So, yes, I’ve grown comfortable being my own best friend, and it’s empowering in a sense because I’ve accomplished so much on my own.

Now that I’ve mentioned this being a privilege…

10. the humbling thing about checking your privilege

As I sat down to write this post, I debated for a bit whether I should even write it when so many bigger things are happening in the world. I mean, just the fact that I’m able to talk about all of these experiences and lessons means that I’m coming from a place of privilege. I want you to know that I genuinely recognize that.

After all, I’ve said it numerous times—I’m truly living my dream! Most people never get the chance to do the things that they really want to do. Instead, obligations and other priorities arise, and their true dreams get put on the back burner until another time.

This awareness and acknowledgment can be difficult and even uncomfortable to process at times. But I try to remind myself that as long as I don’t forget about or ignore my privilege, I’m making a critical first step toward ensuring I act ethically when I’m out in the world. 

Don’t get me wrong, I have also had my fair share of struggles, as we all have, no matter how privileged we are. I definitely haven’t had everything handed to me on a silver platter, as you can see from my story here. And those challenges also help me as I go out and interact with the world.

It’s always important to remind ourselves that we never know everything that someone has gone through to get them to the person that they are today. But the point is, that just by having the ability to read these words, it means, like me, that there’s some level of privilege. It’s not so much having it that matters, but more so what we do with it after recognizing that we have it.

Now that I’ve seen more of the world and have experienced things that I hadn’t before in my life, I’m more able to live with my feet firmly planted on the ground. It’s not something that I can explain in a crystal clear way, but the things I’ve seen and heard on my journey make me even more committed to living my life thoughtfully and honorably. I’m still far from perfect, but each day I make a constant effort to remind myself to practice humility, and I feel like that’s another step forward in helping me grow.

11. not all who desire will succeed

Now that I’ve got one year as a digital nomad under my belt, I can genuinely say I’ve thrown all those preconceived ideas out the window and realized that there’s no “rule book” that you can follow for this type of lifestyle.

The nomadic lifestyle is not for everyone—even those who truly love to travel. It takes commitment, strength, and an unwavering desire to “let go” of many aspects of your life and adapt your personality numerous times along the way.

It also takes a great amount of self-discipline. Being in a new and exciting country or city, getting caught up in just putting things off until later or tomorrow, and going out to explore and have fun is so easy. This temptation is especially true for things related to work. However, if I didn’t consistently adopt a regular work routine and did not remain focused and disciplined, I likely would never be able to accomplish anything. I know many people who could never work the way that I do. They simply wouldn’t achieve any amount of productivity. And that’s OK, because recognizing your limits is a part of growing into the best version of yourself. 

Another thing I’ve consistently mentioned is that you need to be OK with being by yourself—as in, most of the time. Sure, you’ll meet tons of people along the way, but as I discussed at length, most of them are just passing ships. They aren’t the people you’ll sit down with and have a heart-to-heart with about your feelings that day. They aren’t the people whose shoulders you’ll cry on when you’re homesick. Yes, there are exceptions, and you will make that magical connection with another traveler every once in a while, but for the most part, you will do things alone. And you need to be OK with that fact, because if you aren’t, you’ll quickly grow tired and overwhelmed.

Finally, the instability of the lifestyle wears some people down more quickly than others. Almost as soon as you develop some sort of comfort zone at a location, you have to leave it and start all over again. This change happens every few months. Suddenly, you’re in a new place, and all of the daily and weekly routines that you developed will disappear, and you’ll need to create new ones. Not everyone can get used to or enjoy this type of “ever-changing” lifestyle, at least not for the long term. It’s one of the main reasons that some people’s digital nomad journeys are very short-lived.

one thing’s for sure

I’m not close to being done learning, and I can’t wait to discover all the new lessons my adventures will send my way. In fact, I’m pretty sure that the learning will NEVER end, and that thought excites and inspires me. 

No doubt, many, many more lessons will come across my path as I trek along, exploring the world’s playground. I may have even overlooked a few that I’ve already learned and are engrained in my being. But one thing I’m certain of, and I’m sure is certain for you as well, is that no matter how different our journeys are, every journey is one filled with learning. We can be certain that every season of our lives teaches us something.

So what’s next?

i will keep going

So, what’s the biggest takeaway from my over a year of being on this journey? It’s that I’m not going to stop anytime soon. I will keep going. I love what I’m doing. Will it be forever? Certainly not. I crave stability at some point and other certain things in life. But that’s the beauty of living. We never finish writing our book. We can make each chapter as long or as short as we want it to be. (But, of course, I don’t mean this as a distorted sense of freedom.)

I’ll likely re-evaluate and make a few changes to my approach as I continue based on what I’ve already learned. I mean, my first year as a digital nomad was very action-packed and focused on covering a list of things I wanted to see and do and trying to get to them all. I believe this experience was necessary for me so that I could truly understand what I needed to focus on and prioritize next.

Going forward, I plan to slow it down a bit and really start focusing on meaningful and impactful experiences. I’ll do that by taking more time being still, enjoying things, and simply taking it all in, rather than trying to fit in as many experiences as possible. I’m excited to see where this new mindset takes me, how it changes me even more, and the lessons it carries along with it.

Now to the question so many people ask me. Do I feel stuck because I’ve already achieved my dream of becoming a digital nomad? Definitely not!

There’s no way that I’ve already reached my peak. In fact, I’m not even close to seeing the final approach. Yes, there will be difficult or sad days, but that is part of life. That’s just part of being human. And I am not going to stop here. There is only one way forward.

Feeling a great sense of joy doesn’t depend on our daily circumstances or even the mood we are in at any given moment. It’s something deep inside of us. Something that we choose to be. The same holds true for being stuck. If there’s one big realization I really want to share with you here, it’s that we can choose whether or not we want to be stuck. I truly believe that I am where I am now and on my way to where I want to go in the future because I refuse to ever feel stuck.

Life is a continuous journey. And as long as I’m here, I’ll keep going, growing, learning, setting new dreams and goals for myself, creating change, and making an impact.

Will the entire world see my impact? Likely not. But that doesn’t matter. I’m tired of the world’s notion that everything we do has to make us famous, rich, or well-respected. It doesn’t. We can make changes and have an impact in even the smallest places—our families, friends, acquaintances, and even strangers we meet on the street. The ripple effect of those little impacts ends up making a bigger change.

Never be afraid to tackle something that inspires you because you’re afraid that it will go unnoticed or don’t think that others will see it as a valuable use of your time. This is your life, and you were beautifully designed. You have so much potential, and there’s so much room for growth for you.

I know this is often said, but I believe it is only because it is true. That no matter where you are on life’s journey, it is never too late to start over, or to wake up and start living your dreams. It’s also never too late to create new dreams and goals.

Trust me. You’ll start to see your whole world in a new light.

many small steps, one big goal

I’d say my biggest desires in life still remain in the distance. I know I want to impact people positively through my actions, words, and experiences. Each new dream is just another small step toward a big goal.

Yes, I’m a digital nomad, but again, I’m not “stuck” there, and I know I haven’t peaked. I still love everything about this season of my life—every new person, experience, and encounter. I’m not ready to give these things up.

I’m also working on other small goals to push myself forward. I’ve set a goal of publishing my first book next year on my 30th birthday (for real! so exciting!), and I’ve been training for my first full marathon (and beyond!). I’ve also been tinkering around with other ideas constantly flowing from my creative juice.

To be honest, some days it feels like I’m biting off more than I can chew, but as I just stressed, you should never feel like you have to limit or hold back your goals and dreams. 

So, that is the most important lesson that I want to share with you all, and I hope I’ve shared it well. Challenge yourself. Push yourself. Have faith and take heart. And finally, never ever let your circumstances determine your happiness. I’ve met some of the happiest people in some of the most challenging circumstances.

Remember, the voice inside of you is more important than all the outside noise. Listen to it and let it guide you. If someone tells you the opposite of your inner voice, ignore them! Nobody knows you better than you know yourself, and even the best friends don’t fully understand your true desires deep down in your heart. 

If you want to experience the digital nomad lifestyle, do it! Take the chance and try it out. If you discover that it isn’t for you, that’s OK. You haven’t failed. The experience will help you to grow as a person and change in ways that you never thought possible. Remember, you don’t have to fit into any expectations.  

I know for certain that I’m still growing. It’s always been my ultimate dream to be a changemaker, so with every small step I take or little thing I do, I’m trying to move toward that goal. Will I ever ultimately reach it? Who knows? It may take months, it may take years, or it may take the rest of my life.

Until then, you’ll find me wonderfully wandering.