Today is the first official day of my epic journey to make a living doing what I love, to live my passion, and to embrace my fear of the unknown.

Just two weeks ago, I quit my full-time job in exchange for the uncertainty that this new chapter of my life will bring. This was by far the most important decision I’d ever made in my entire 24 years of existence. Prior to where I am now, my life was essentially the same as everyone else’s.

But something about what I’ve been doing has left me feeling lifeless, cold, and desperate. I began to feel trapped in a life that didn’t make me happy, and I didn’t know what to do to change it.

I wished I was like those other people who have a more practical career path in mind, as if you know the course or steps to take to achieve that goal in your head. Then maybe I wouldn’t be so worried about the future and act like a crying baby. But damn, all I want is to be published and featured in National Geographic, to have my own documentary on Netflix, to work with the most creative people, to produce a film that has an impact and celebrates the lives of all people around the world, to explore the most hidden places, to travel and immerse myself in different cultures, and to be constantly out there learning everything that this world has to offer. This is my big dream. I know some people think it’s unrealistic, impractical, strange, and crazy, but I guess that’s just who I am. I don’t want to fit in or accept the status quo. I want to be as big and as daring as my dream.

Most of you have been messaging me about how inspiring it is to make such a move. Newsflash: I’ve been scared up until now. Yes, solo travel counts, but there is a distinction to be made between traveling and leaving and becoming more independent.

No, I did not wake up one day and say, “I QUIT.”

I don’t think you can have an epiphany and then throw everything up the next day when you wake up. It actually took years of laughter, questioning, and meltdowns for me to be able to break free from these shackles of life. And it will take you years to figure out who you truly are, what you truly want, and where you want to go. It does not happen overnight. The decisions you are making today, about who you are right now, are the result of who you were before – all those bad decisions and wrong choices you made, those sleepless nights which had you wondering if he was the one or not, those nights when you were completely wasted and crying out to your friends about how miserable you felt about your life.

Here is a question to start this with…

Would you want to spend the majority of your limited time on this planet working on something you don’t enjoy? Is it, however, as simple as cooking instant noodles to turn your life upside down to pursue your passion? NO WAY!

Because of fear and a lack of self-belief, I was one of those people who constantly doubted their abilities. But then I realized that fear is a natural emotion. Are you afraid of it? Great! Because being afraid makes you feel more alive! It’s an important part of the process. To tell you the truth, I’ve failed far more than I’ve succeeded, but it’s through my failures that I’ve grown and learned.

I had a goal in mind

I’m not just a visual learner; I’m also a visualizer. If you’ve been in my room, you’ll notice that I have a board on my desk where I post all of the memorable moments I’ve had to get me inspired and motivated to get going every morning. I firmly believe that if you can visualize something, you can make it a reality.

I’ve always wanted to move from one place to another since I was a child. I believe this is one of the reasons I was given the name Nomarie: I’ve been called to live a nomadic life. With all joking aside, I set myself the goal of quitting my job, not knowing when or how. This was the very first. I mean, how else would I be able to live my dream if I didn’t risk losing my job? I knew at the time that the goal was illogical – I had no concrete plan. But I felt that having any goal was preferable to having no goal at all.

To be honest, I had no idea whether the goal was worthwhile or whether it was the goal I should set for myself. And, as it turned out, despite having a goal in mind, I always end up living a life of mediocrity. I’m talking about years of trial and error, years of attempting a variety of challenges and risks, years of looking “out there” for peace and happiness, years of constant change… until I eventually yearned for freedom. I felt like a caged animal trying to escape, but I didn’t know how to deal with it.

So I began assessing myself, basically digging deep into who I am as a person – what my strengths and weaknesses are, what my interests are, and what activities make my spine tingle. I started signing up for nomad life ops, self-studied how to make videos, worked on my own website, joined like-minded groups, networked with like-minded people, and read more articles and guidelines to help me plan out my goal. I needed specific goals to help me stay on track.

Sounds cliché but it’s true – BELIEVE

December 2017 – The universe has finally opened a door for me. I received an email from an influencer I’ve been following for a while. I was chosen to join them and create videos all over the world, beginning in South Africa and moving on to Morocco, Europe, and other African countries. So, how did I react? There was nothing but tears. How can someone who isn’t a pro at video editing be chosen over everyone who is unquestionably far superior to me? I mean, I was in a state of complete shock.

It took a drastic change of perspective

This is a big one. This is a deal breaker. I recall sitting at my desk, the computer screen staring back at me. It was as if we were having a silent eye-to-eye conversation in a cold, empty room. It was full of disdain, but I was really lost. I began writing down how I was feeling, listing in bullet points everything that had been bothering me for years and everything that made me happy on the other side. “I need to change something”. After all these years, I realized that I had been so focused on complaining about how unfair my life has been to me. I failed to recognize that it is a lie to be told that you need to be in a position where you exceed the world’s standards. I failed to see the lessons in all of the difficulties I’ve faced. That instead of doing something, I was simply waiting and hoping for a miracle. But this is not the case. I can’t just sit back and let the universe do the work for me. Yes, life is terrifying, and I am terrified right now. But I’ve realized that at the end of the day, I’d rather say I risked too much than not risked enough. Going after your own happiness may appear to be extremely selfish, but life is too short, right? We never know what awaits us tomorrow, or the next day, or in a few months. Maybe you’re not sure if quitting your job is the best thing to do. Maybe you’ll never know. But, just as there is no night without day, there is no success without trying.

I believe the time has come for me to figure out who I am and who I am not, and to see how far I can go. This is the ideal time for me to make mistakes, test my limits, and figure out what legacy I want to leave on this planet. This was exactly the mindset I took when deciding to leave my job. I knew I was leaving the corporate world, with its career security, comfort, and familiarity, as well as a good salary. But, no matter how beneficial staying in that job might have been, I knew it was not what I wanted to do or be for the rest of my life.

The heart wants what it wants

Is it just that I’m feeling overwhelmed? Is this something I’m prepared for? How am I supposed to explain this to my family? WHEN YOU FEEL JOY OVER FEAR, YOU KNOW IT’S YOUR HEART TALKING. The realization that I wasn’t myself anymore eventually pushed me over the edge and made it clear that I couldn’t go on. My work was no longer energizing for me. I was aware that there was a void that I needed to fill. And here it is: I am finally getting the break I have been looking for for what seemed like an eternity. Soooo… I said YES.

I figured out everything from A to Z. From explaining to my family to quitting my full-time job to writing down a detailed plan for how I’m going to support myself from now on. I’m not in a position to say that abandoning everything for your passion is the best advice I can give you. I mean, I’ve only just begun. I don’t yet have a testimony to share. Unlike other advocates who have done so and are now successful in their own businesses/careers, I have no idea what awaits me on the other side.

But I do believe in one thing: only by risking going too far will I be able to discover how far I can go. As a result, you have two choices: stay stuck or take the risk and move forward.I made the decision to leave and pursue a life filled with passion.

I’m not sure what will happen, but I’m not going to let my fear get in the way. This is me smashing this brick wall of fear.

So here I am, making my first move

I have a lot of exciting things coming up in the coming months that I can’t wait to share with y’all on this site.

Now I can say that I am working harder than I have ever worked before, pulling all-nighters with joy in my heart, and doing things with purpose, heart, and a goal in mind. I’ve had enough of worrying about the past and the future. Instead, I carry the wisdom of the past, hope for the future, and the strength to face the present. I’m diving into the great unknown with nothing but a strong belief in what I’m doing and the determination to persevere. Most importantly, I realized I might be taking the biggest risk of all: putting my dreams on hold in the hope of having the opportunity to pursue them later. So, “screw it, let’s do it!”

Elbert Hubbard once said, “The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.”

This may not go as planned or expected, but I’m happy to say that I won’t be crying 10 years from now saying, “I should have done that.” At the end of the day, every risk is rewarded with a valuable learning experience. We can only grow, reach our full potential, and learn to control the changes in our lives if we are bold and brave.